A day without guilt....?

I stayed home with my two year old today. He woke me at 2am,then again at 3am...and by 4am-I gave in and emailed my boss. Something like, "my bleary-eyed, cranky self with no inner monologue will not be at work today. No thanks necessary :)" It has always been difficult for me to cancel or "no-show" to anything, especially work. Even now, as a parent, I still find myself cringing with each email I send apologizing for my absence. Recently,I toured my rising Kindergartener's new "big boy school." We pulled into the parking lot, I viewed the large building where my teensy child was to walk into (with his little backpack and matching lunchbox) in a matter of months and then I cried. Sobbing really, with an after-pity party: "he's too little", "how did 5 years pass by so quickly" and finally-the very useful "wherehaveIbeenwhatkindofmomamI?" You know that's how the sobbing rants sound! So, since my Susan Lucci-esque scene in the elementary school, I've kinda given up guilt (note:the 'kinda' thrown in...let's be real!) There was a moment-one of those heavens open up, host of angels singing moments today: I had a choice between opening up one of the growing number of emails in my inbox or watching my two year old's face when it dawned on him that he'd never heard this Katy Perry song. I watched the two year old rock out to Katy Perry-my heart grew 3 sizes (I'm aware of the Grinch reference...I believe my kids could easily confuse my face with Jim Carrey's green on most days. True story :) and I felt completely free of any guilt. Calendar marked!